Do you know how depressing it is when you go to your wardrobe 4 months after your baby is born and you still have more (and nicer!) maternity tops than actual normal tops? Pretty darn depressing I have to say. I was going out for lunch with a couple of friends today and looking for something to wear when I realised this.
I have purchased a few skirts lately because I have decided I like skirts (long of course cos I hate my legs), they make me feel feminine which is necessary when you live in a house full of boys and spend most of the time in jeans and t-shirts getting food spilled on you at least once a day!! In the end I decided on a dark brown skirt and a beige top(maternity!!!!!) which I thought was fine until some time this afternoon when I looked in the mirror again and realised the colour made me look old and haggard - this could also be due to my being under the weather with a cold and tired a lot lately. Whatever the reason I didn't feel very good about myself.
My biggest problem (and there are many!) is that I seem to find it impossible to buy clothes for myself without feeling guilty. So what usually happens is I buy clothes for Lee, Conor or Eoin or sometimes all three. I don't feel the guilt this way because I am buying for them and not for me. I find it a lot easier to buy for them too because I know what fits them and what will look good on them and don't have to worry about picking up something that won't fit or makes me look fat or shows off all my lovely bulges. Yes, I know there are ways to fix these problems but that takes time and in the mean time I don't want to go on feeling like a pregnant has been so I need to get my act together(and my confidence) and go try on some tops!
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